Sit Wiff Me, Pease!

We entered her room which was a little too warm for comfort: blinds slightly open, no television or radio to break up the deafening silence, only the hustle and bustle of hurried footsteps outside her door. Her back was to us as we entered her room, and we beheld her as she looked through the slits in her blinds. Her little, frail hands were gently folded atop a shawl as it covered her slight legs that perched on the footrests of her wheelchair. She was the picture of elegance and calm, though undeniably lonely. I had not met her yet, but I already loved her. For sake of anionimity, let's call her Ellen. She is a resident of the nursing home where my son works, and where he invests a bit of his soul each day. To say that I am proud of my son is an understatement. To see him in his element as he cares for these geriatric dear ones is one of my greatest joys.

My grandson, my niece, my mother and I had come to the nursing home to visit Tyler, my handsome boy, so that Tyler's son, Carter, could have lunch with his dad. Dressed in his pre-Halloween fireman suit Carter was excited to see his dad as always and share some fast food and Daddy-Son talk. I was excited to see the affection and tenderness exchanged between two of the loves of my life. Before the lunch date ended, Tyler decided we should meet his favorite resident, Ellen. We were eager to see this lady that he was beaming about as he talked of her.

Ellen was everything you would want in a grandmother. She declared to us that she WAS Tyler's grandma. She was not confused or experiencing dementia, she was merely letting us know she had adopted him as her own. I was grateful. I was proud. I was touched deeply. I reached to shake her hand and thank her for loving my boy. Her hands were pale, small and soft as velvet. I resisted the urge to bring them to my cheeks and experience their warm, softness on my face. She reminded me so much of my grandmother, and I immediately knew why Tyler loved her. My motley crew quickly brought an end to the silence and solitude of her room, but I could tell it was a welcomed change. My niece, Mari, sat on her bed and chattered away. My grandson, at first shy, soon warmed to her patient demeanor and gentle discourse. He looked at a senior magazine with her as if it were the best Mickey Mouse book around. My son was proud of how his son welcomed Ellen into his heart. I was honored to be an onlooker at this moment. Leaving Ellen was hard. She wanted us to stay longer, but the duties and responsibilities of life have a way of keeping us moving forward. Hugs, expressions of gratitude and a trek to the car later we were on our way home.

What a day! After taking my niece home for the evening and allowing the cousins to say tearful good-byes (not because they never see each other, but because they wanted more fun, more games, more play...sounds pretty good to me!) We had visited Lewis Farms, ridden a wagon, fed some pigs and other farm animals, zoomed down some pretty amazing slides, met old acquaintances, made new friends and were finally now ready to settle into the evening and prepare for church tomorrow. I gave Carter some milk and apple slices and put on his favorite movie, "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs". My plan was to mop (babies always equal mopping and sticky spills, I think...but it's actually kind of nice...when you have babies, you must have dogs...It's a free vacuuming service! Of course, I digress). I also had the neverending laundry pile, some cooking and various other chores and my own homework responsibilities. So, it was going to be multitasking mode for me. As the movie began, I walked away to begin my work and I heard the sweetest wee voice that can cause me to move mountains. It said, "Nina, da movie starting. Sit wiff me, Nina!" Nina, Nana Lisa, paused for a moment. I was about protest, but I remembered Ellen. I remembered her sitting in the nursing home at peace, but alone. She would love for someone to sit "wiff" her or for her to sit "wiff" someone. She would gladly forego any of life's mundane, incessant chores for a moment of fellowship. My mind went back eleven years ago, and I remembered being in the same house where Carter's father had sat in that very same spot that he sat now. Tyler was ten years old then and didn't really ask me to sit with him anymore except when we did family devotions at night. I remembered how tired I was in those days after doing homework with my children, packing lunches, preparing dinner, cleaning  up, making sure everyone was bathed and ready for the next day. I remembered relishing my alone time, which seemed to be very rare (how life has changed...and how life is still the same is humorous). Standing there looking at Carter's beautiful brown eyes I reflected on how I would love to turn back time and sit "wiff" my son and my daughter again. Both of my children are driving now and quickly preparing to leave my nest. My how time does fly! How the days quickly pass without us noticing. Only six months ago my dad was here, and now life is different. Things do change, as they say. Surely this life is but a vapor. It is here today and gone tomorrow, and at the end all that really matters is how well we have loved. 

 "Hey...Nina...Sit wiff me, pease! Wook! Da movie starting!" He pleaded again as he patted the spot beside him. He was right! This was the "Best Yes!" as I have been learning. I have said yes to a lot of the less important things lately, but tonight, I think I'll sit wiff my Carter for awhile as we save the world vicariously through animated scientists, some imaginary paint-on shoes and some Italian main dishes!! He nestled in a ball underneath my arm. I buried my nose in his blonde hair and kissed his Johnson and Johnson Baby Shampoo scented locks. The kisses were too many to count. He permitted it. He enjoyed it. My heart grew another inch, I am sure, as I relished this moment with an unexpected little gift that I was allowed to hold in my arms for this delicate moment. It was then I realized anew that we are constantly bombarded with gifts. It's up to us to notice them, to embrace them, to experience them, to choose the best "yes" of the day! 

"Learning how to be still-to really be still-and let life happen, that stillness becomes a radiance!" 

Morgan Freeman

Captain Obvious

Sitting here, tonight I am totally "chill" as the youth might say. I love the twilight. I love the sound of my fan buzzing. I love the bullfrogs singing their love songs in my back yard. I love the sound of my family shuffling around in the kitchen and the living room lamp that glows through the bedroom door like a flame. I love how my fur babies feel as they and my multiple pillows surround me while I write. This stolen moment gives me some reprieve to reflect and enjoy my passion--writing! I don't really have the time to write. I have the never ending laundry pile, dogs to bathe, emails to answer, Sunday lunch to prepare, etc., etc. Actually though, to tell the truth, I have been writing all day long in between working and life's necessities. I've read or written something for my two classes to ad nauseam, but that's not the same. When life is overwhelming, when I can't come up for air, when there is too much to do and too little resources to do it...that's when you have to write! That's when you have to push back and go on the offensive! There's no more perfect time, no better way to stake your claim, no better way to remember who you are, in my "book" (pun intended) than to let all those emotions and thoughts spill out onto an empty page---a page waiting to capture who you are.

It was early this morning that I knew I would be writing tonight. Have you ever just needed a Captain Obvious in your life? Yes, we make fun of these people sometimes at our meetings and gatherings when they state something that is self evident, something that is obvious to even the most dimly lit in the room. Yet, how many times do we miss the obvious? How many times do we miss the forest for the trees, or better yet; how many times do we miss the beauty of one individual and uniquely beautiful Dogwood for all the leaves and brush? That has been me, even though I strive hard to "see" what might be missed everyday. I sometimes fall short. I sometimes miss the obvious. Jesus reminds us of this in Mark 8:18 New International Version (NIV) "Do you have eyes but fail to see, and ears but fail to hear? And don’t you remember?" Sometimes, we have to cause ourselves to see, to hear and remember. 

There is a pair of earrings that I have which are unique and dear to me (those of you who have been in my closet and seen my accessories would laugh...because I have many such earrings---yet trust me, they all have their own "special" home--LOL!).  On yesterday, I wanted to wear them. I thought they would match a necklace I was wearing that day. I have a gold tone pair and two similar silver tone pairs. I went to their location to get them, but the lights were dim, and I didn't think I saw them. I thought they were the gold tone's silver twin. So, I said, "Goodness! That's the silver ones! I wanted the gold ones!" Something prompted me to look closer, but I was in a hurry, and I didn't. Instead I looked in other locations where the gold ones might have landed. I looked for a minute or two. Finally, I gave up and grabbed another pair. All the while something was prompting me to look again. I didn't look again. I refused to see! I was busy with life and no time to focus.
Today, it was the same story. I needed those earrings. I went back to look at the ones I had seen the day before. "Doggone! Where are my gold ones?" Again, God prompted, "Lisa, take those earrings out of their place, and look at them. Go ahead...look at them." I did, and you know the story. It was my gold earrings. "What? How in the world did I miss that?" I was embarrassed and shocked that I didn't see something so obvious. I missed out on wearing them yesterday, because I refused to see. It was right under my nose all along!
Isn't that the truth, though. How many times is the answer we are searching for right under our nose? How many times is it right in our face? The answer has a name. The obvious "thing" that we are missing can be called in a moment's notice. His name is Jesus. Yes, He is the obvious answer to all our frustrations, cares and concerns. He is all we need. He is our more than enough. Whenever life becomes crammed to overflowing, mostly by our own choices, and however tough the trail, we have an obvious and ready friend. He will wipe our tears. He will hold us tightly in his arms. He will restore our broken places. He will redeem our losses and give us grace for the journey. I don't want to miss Him. I want to see Him in the everyday and the mundane, as well as in the glorious. I don't want to miss the ones He places in my path to love. I don't want to hold back the love He has placed in my heart, because I am preoccupied with the cares of this life. I am so thankful for Captain Obvious who never lets me jump ship even when I think I might! He holds me fast and directs our sails forward. "Oh Captain, My Captain...I adore You!"