Two Decades, Two Years and Two Kids Later

Tomorrow June 20 at 6:45 p.m., Jamie and I will have been married for twenty two years! Wow! Time sure flies! I can recall our wedding day as if it were yesterday! I remember his sweet proposal, searching for the perfect wedding dress, saying "I do" and our Honeymoon in a cabin in the mountains of Tennessee. As I sat on the porch swing reflecting on my new marriage, while my new husband grilled hamburgers and loved how impressed his new bride was with his grilling abilities, I tried to imagine what it would be like to grow old with this man with whom I had become betrothed. I am now experiencing a part of this reality.

Through the years, Jamie has been my rock, my stability, my calm when life goes crazy. He is such a predictable man. I know him to his core, but others soon find out, too, that Jamie is the same in private as he is in public. I have never met anyone with more integrity. He eats the same foods, orders the same items at restaurants, buys the same clothes brands, uses the same shampoo and soap, keeps pretty much the same schedule. He isn't a complicated man. This used to drive me nuts! I wanted him to do something spontaneous or to color outside the lines. Who knew that twenty two years later the best thing about Jamie, for me, is his stability, his predictability and his steadfastness. Jamie is able to stay calm when things around us are falling apart. He is able to make you believe it will be okay even when it looks catastrophic. I have appreciated this so much the past few weeks. The day after my anniversary will be the one month anniversary of my dad's passing, and Jamie's strength has kept me afloat! He has held my hand while I fell asleep, he has held me until I could fall asleep, he has comforted me when I wake up in a panic at the thoughts of my dad being gone, he has been my shoulder to cry on and my buddy to laugh with throughout this process. The boy I married so long ago has become the most amazing man I have ever known.

It is true that opposites attract! Those who know Jamie and me would not agree more! He is my "You can do this, Lisa! You're stronger than you know", "Lisa, you're harder on you than anyone else is" and "How can you be so great and not know it! How can you not see YOU".  I am his "Jamie, life doesn't always have to be lived at break neck speeds. Let's slow down. Let's smell the roses", "There doesn't have to be a reason, let's just do it, because it's fun!" and "Yes, we can make room for one more (insert whatever here)." He is the calm, the simple, the steady. I am the passion, the excitement the emotional. He is the head. I am the heart. This seems to be a pretty good team!

Happy Anniversary, Honey! Thanks for sticking with me through this crazy roller coaster ride of our life! All these years ago, when you were headed to Florida to pursue your master's degree and your love of music with your well laid out plan, I am thankful you saw something/someone that you wanted even more than this! Even 22 years later, I am still derailing you from your plans from time to time (when no one else in the world can), but I think you kinda like it sometimes! I love you with all my heart, and I am Truly in Love with You, too!

The song he played when he won my heart forever! 

Your Low Places Prepare You for Your High Places

It's been twelve days since Dad died, the man that I didn't think could die, and in many ways he hasn't. He lives in my heart, in the twinkle of my son's eyes and in the dimples that my sister and I proudly wear. He also lives in the memories that comfort me. There is no doubt that I will see him again.

Today was one of those days, Buddy! I, of course, miss my dad; but there is also the sorting out of what life will be like now. What are our new roles? What do we do with all of his things? Will we ever need to plan vacations around Dad's health? No. I still have that can of sardines I bought him that no one appreciates except the two of us. Do I need to buy sardines again? How do his beloved dogs feel now that their favorite person is no longer here. It's just the new adjustment to life that knocks you off balance these days. The ultimate question I guess is "Who am I now?"

What an appropriate day for this question. I went to help one of my sweet seventh grade band directors with some tech integration after school. I wasn't sure how much I would have to offer, but it turns out that it was a Divine appointment. We shared and we worked. We brainstormed and are excited about some plans we made for next year...a new year! A year where there will be more excitment, more growth opportunities, more celebrations and more differences to be made! We finally concluded our meeting, but since her bandroom is apart from the school, I was locked out of the building. This was a Divine appointment too. I got a teacher to let me in where I worked from the cafeteria until the end of the day. This cafeteria was a defining point in my life!

As a seventh girl who was awkward, shy, smart and pensive I spent a lot of moments in this same cafeteria wondering who I am and what was my purpose. I sat there this afternoon vividly remembering where I sat all those years ago, who sat around me, the nervous middle school knot in my stomach and the silent prayers that I shared between the Lord and I. I remembered that He never forsook me. He took care of me then.

As I sat there remembering, a Christian brother and pastor like my dad, happened into the silent, dimly lit cafeteria. He showed me a picture of his beautiful one week old baby girl and told me the story of what a miracle she is. He beamed! I loved hearing the story of such a proud parent. What a great dad! Then I received my gift from God and from a brother...he said, "Mrs. Montgomery, I believe in taking care of things in the present. When God speaks to my heart, I like to quickly obey. I'd like to pray for you and your family right now." (Those of you who know me-- know this is NOT a problem for me). He reminded that my dad is in my future not my past. He reminded me not to put a period where God put a comma. He said, "Mrs. Montgomery, your low places prepare you for your high places!" I know this and believe this with everything I am! What he didn't know is that Hinds Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard, a Christian allegory, made a huge impact on my life all these years ago! As he took my hand and began to pray, I heard him with tears streaming down my face say the most beautiful prayer. He concluded by saying, "Father, Mrs. Montgomery, will dwell under Your shelter, our Most High; and she will rest under the shadow of Your wings." Psalm 91:1.

In this sweet moment, I was reminded again of who I am (or rather whose I am). I am more than a daughter of the amazing man, Ronnie Harstin. I am the daughter of Jehovah-'Izoa Hakaboth---Lord Strong and Mighty!